A question I think about not too often, but often enough– how comfortable is too comfortable?
Picture this; For years, you’ve struggled with accepting yourself and your body and the like. Before you know it, you are in a fully loving relationship. You are constantly smothered with hugs and kisses and… compliments! Compliments coming from left and right, some things you even had no idea you’d ever be compliment on. Soon enough, you learn to be around your boyfriend without any makeup, hair up, stuffing your face with a box of mini donuts. Then, you begin to shower less, and eat more, all because he loves you for you, and that isn’t going to change. Then, you start to see a change you don’t like. Weight gain. Acne. Complete discomfort.
Now, I am not saying don’t eat in front of your s/o. I am not saying always wear makeup in front of your s/o. I am not saying any of this, because yes, you should be completely and utterly comfortable with the person you are dedicating your life too. However, it’s never too late to try.
I’ve heard, in many instances, after years of being in a relationship what’s the point of trying to look good anymore, or actually make an effort? Well, here’s a thought– just because you are in a relationship, and maybe believe it is fate, doesn’t mean that it can’t end. Miracles and fate may be possible, however every single relationship needs work until each humans last breath. That’s just the jist of it; that’s what a relationship is all about.
Working on a relationship also takes some working on your self, as well. As you grow and mature and learn to love another human, you are also working on loving yourself, because you can not be in a fully loving relationship with another human without having the slightest bit of love for yourself. You have to know that they love you, you have to have trust in them, and you have to have trust in yourself, and be confident that you’re doing everything right, and everything to make them happy.
Just because you have been with your s/o for a year, or maybe even 12, doesn’t mean you should stop trying, or putting in effort. Having a man love you for you, in your purest form is exactly what every woman wants. However, you can’t let yourself go solely because you are finally comfortable. Being comfortable in a relationship, you should want to have nights where you wear no makeup and stuff your face with mini donuts, however, the next morning you should want to wake up and go for a run, to show your s/o that you take care of yourself, not only for the sake of yourself, but also for them.
A happy relationship is much easier to maintain when each person is healthy. When one person in the relationship is unhealthy, it usually takes a toll on the other. Just because you aren’t a workout fanatic, doesn’t mean you can’t take care of yourself and your body in one way or another. Taking care of yourself is important, because it also plays a huge roll in your part of taking care of the relationship. It’s 50/50, remember?
Not to always bring a relation to my life in these posts, I just think it shows that I have more knowledge and experience than most of you may think. I believe Rory and I meeting was fate– a miracle– however, meant to be. Though, this doesn’t mean problems can’t occur. Him and I are kindred spirits. We both understand each other so well, I believe because we are similar on so many levels. I have never met another human being who understands me the way he does, and doesn’t want to change anything about me– just genuinely loves me for exactly how I am.
With that being said, I take as best of care of myself as I can. Yes, sometimes I eat an entire donut and bite his, or a half a pint of ice cream. Yes, sometimes I go days without doing my hair or putting on makeup, but that doesn’t mean I am letting myself go. I am taking full advantage of being my natural, and purest self around him. However, I love to look good to make him happy, and make myself feel 10x happier.
I love doing my hair and putting on makeup and picking out a cute outfit for a night out with him. I don’t do it just to make him happy. I do it because when he’s happy, I’m even happier. I have lazy days, I slip up, I’m human. But every relationship is like a flower– it needs to be watered and nurtured and fed and constantly cared for in order to blossom and grow. I continue to care for myself, yes because I want to look and feel good, but also because I want Rory to know I am healthy and happy, thanks to him. So you tell me– how comfortable is too comfortable in a relationship?